The following ramblings are based on real-life experiences, mishaps, and downright screw-ups. Names (of past, present, and future boyfriends) have been changed or omitted to protect the innocent. And the guilty...

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Random's Manifest - Thursday Thoughts

Ta Da!!!  It's time again for RANDOM THOUGHTS!!!  YAY!!!!!!!  I know you're as excited as I am!! 
Everyone knows that nothing makes you want to do something like being told you can't.  Eating?  No exception. I'm on a fast for a medical procedure tomorrow.  Haven't been able to eat since midnight.  Still have 20 hours to go.  I'm about to keel over.  

There have been plenty of days when I have plain forgotten to eat.  Didn’t feel like this!  Just being told that I can’t have food has made it the central focus of ALL of my thoughts.  I. WANT. FOOD.  So much food.  Hamburgers and fries and shakes and sushi and pizza and ice cream and marshmallows and pop tarts… Anything.  This fruit pie staring at me right now?  I’d eat its cardboard box at this point.  However will I make it to noon tomorrow??  Sigh…

The Bitch is Back
Yes, only the BITCH from the CPA Exam Board could turn the most amazing news into a total pain in my ass.  No congratulations whatsoever for passing Financial.  Rather, I get a curt email informing me that the Board has approved my request for additional time on the remaining section (yay!), followed VERY quickly by another email saying SYKE! – they won’t give me more time without more information (BOO!).  I told her to forget the whole damn thing and give me my Notice to Schedule for the final section.  And, I also indicated that I would NOT be okay with her keeping the $300 she already charged to my credit card to reschedule the section I passed.  I know for a fact she is going to say I shouldn’t have jumped the gun and assumed I would need to retake it, and that she has every right to keep that money.  Not like they don’t already have enough of my money – seeing as I’ve sunk approximately $5,000 into testing fees. 

Normally I reserve my animosity and harassing tendencies for the cable company.  But, I think my focus should shift to the Bitch for a while.  As soon as I pass the last section, I think I will make a hobby of ruining her life, much like she’s ruined mine.  Won’t that be fun?

Want to eat my own arm right now…

The Soap
My name is Kristen, and I’m a Y&R addict.

I admit, I have a problem.  I’ve invested roughly 31 years in the CBS daytime drama, the Young and the Restless.  LITERALLY watching since birth.  And I ask myself -EVERY DAY – why?  This show is insane, and I’m embarrassed that it’s an integral part of my daily life.  All shame aside - a couple of quick requests to the writers/producers:
  1. PLEASE go ahead and reveal that “Mama Bear” is Sheila.  And, from the sounds of it, she now has Lauren’s face.  We all know where this lame and overdone storyline is going.  Let’s get this over with…
  2. Get rid of Ashley.  Eileen Davidson is NOT a good actress.  She’s proven this in recent weeks.  Get a new one!
  3. Billy and Victoria – Thank goodness they finally did it and got it over with.  Now, let’s get those two together for real.  Finally – a couple with chemistry!
  4. Lily really needs some better wigs.
  5. PLEASE tell Jack that Summer is his.  This is ridiculous.

    I hope that old lady is okay
    When I went to the pharmacy today to pick up my “prep kit” for my procedure tomorrow, a little old lady fell in the parking lot.  I, of course, (being a human being and all – and not Satan) ran to her assistance.  She swore she was okay, but I’m not sure.  She was pretty shaky.  I remember when that sort of thing used to happen to my Granny.  Scares the crap out of me.  I sure hope she’s okay.  Say a little prayer for her…

    SOOOOOOOO Hungry….

    Hot in the City
    So, we all know I’m pretty psyched for spring.  However, I do find it odd that the high today is 85, and tomorrow, it’s 88.  It’s April.  I sure hope this isn’t a sign that our summer will be as dramatic as the winter was…

    Bitchy Update
    As I’ve been writing this, I heard back from the Bitch on my two [rather forceful] requests.  Yes, she will go ahead and send my Notice to Schedule.  And YES – she will refund the fees.  THANK GOODNESS.  I really didn’t want to have to wait for her in a dark alley with a baseball bat…

    Chicken!  Grab hold of that table floating by and drift to safety!
    Chicken is under water in Rhode Island!  Oh no!  Our horrible storms from last weekend made their way up to the northeast.  Chicken – I hope there’s no damage!  And, keep the frogs as pets.  They’re so cute!  And you know littleb would love that!   

    Alright crazy kids – I’m off to starve some more, and do a little work for a while.  Cross your fingers that I survive this miserable procedure.  And that I can remember there are people who are actually starving in this world, and I am a gigantic spoiled bratty baby. 

    Holla!  (Still sounds weird coming from me…)


    Miss Morgan said...

    You're so right! All it takes for me to insanely want to do something is for someone to first tell me that I can't.

    No, you can't have the cookie...OMG I WANT THE COOKIE!!

    The Chicken's Consigliere said...

    Aw, SS. I love that Froggy. He's going with me. Glad that CPA exam bitch is not giving you too hard of a time and thanks for the good wishes.

    Anonymous said...

    Oh SS, I am thinking of you today! You'll be able to eat soon! So here's my story about your situation and cosmic links-- it's 6am and I'm up right now because it's the last time I am allowed to eat for several hours before a physical, and I open your blog and read your post and am so glad I'm reading it over my "last" bowl of cereal and not 30 minutes later! I know with just the 6 hour fast I will want to eat my hand. Don't even ask me about the 3-day medical liquid-only-diet-then-12-hours-of-fasting from this summer! Just be glad you weren't there...

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