Waist So Skinny - Mondays

So, the whole diet thing?  Not going so well.  I forgot to weigh myself this morning in my frenzy to catch a 7:30 flight (running through the airport OJ Simpson-style to the gate only to have the flight delayed an hour...), but I know I wouldn't like the results if I had.  I thought forcing myself to post my dieting failures would prevent them from occurring, but I would be wrong.  As such, in no particular order, I bring you this week's list of excuses for why I didn't watch the ol' weight (Incidentally, the following also serve as my excuses for not blogging hardly at all, either): 

1. I was traveling for work.  We've already discussed the negative impact that has on all my good intentions. 
2. On said work trip, I caught strep from some nasty fat lady in front of me who wouldn't stop coughing and blowing her nose on the sold-out flight.  Grr... 
3. I stayed at my mom's while my out-of-town family stayed at my house, so I'd have my own bed and not infect anyone.  Therefore, I was at the mercy of my mom's menu for the weekend. And it was quite tasty!
4. It was Easter. 
5. The internet was down from Friday morning until tonight at my mom's (yeah, yeah - I know that shouldn't affect my diet.  It did prevent me from posting any brilliant witticisms, though...).
6. That Chick-Fil-A milkshake was very soothing on my strep-ridden throat! (As was the second one I had today...) 
7. I was in Wisconsin, so I needed the body fat in order to keep warm. 
8. Actually, I really just need to say: I was in Wisconsin.  Let's face it, that's excuse enough.  

At the moment, I'm in Reading, PA.  As such, I have already started working on my list for next week's entry.  In the meantime, I think I'll embrace the curves... 

Waist So Skinny - Mondays

Drop 10 Lbs and Do It Now Campaign of 2011: Week One Results

I am somewhat pleased to report the following weight-loss results for the week of April 4-April 11, despite having spent two days at my grandfather’s (aka “The Land that Time Forgot”), where the healthiest food in town comes from the Wendy’s drive through.  In other words, diet successfully blown in 48 hours. Regardless:

Weight: -2.8 Lbs

Times I Exercised: None.  (Shut up – baby steps, you know)

I impulse bought the Ab-Circle Pro last week after getting sucked in by the mini-infomercial:

Since it’s small enough to fold up and slide under the couch, I thought I might be motivated to use it while I watch TV.  But, then again, that was the theory behind my elliptical, too, and we all see how well that worked out.  Basically though, I’m a sucker for As Seen on TV exercise products, and the reviews on ACP were surprisingly decent.  However, there are several reports of this little machine being a little bit difficult for those who are coordinationally challenged, including horror stories of sliding off of the knee pads and wiping out at regular intervals.  As we all know (see “Drop it Like it’s Hot” for a typical day in my life), I am the world’s biggest klutz.  So, if nothing else, the Ab-Circle Pro will provide a flurry of business for the local ER and hours of entertainment for any circumstantial bystanders.  Too bad for you guys I’m not too handy with a video camera, or I would post my efforts.  (Well, probably not.  I’m all for self-humiliation, but that may be taking things a bit too far…)

So, anywho, hopefully my report will be better next Monday.  Keep your fingers crossed that I can stick with it this week.

 

Waist So Skinny - Mondays

Well kiddos, yours truly has, in this first quarter of 2011, redefined the art of stress eating.  Unfortunately, in so doing, I have also redefined my waistline, and not in a good way.  


Let me put it this way - I still weigh 10 lbs more than my sister and she is a centimeter dilated and 50% effaced. 


As such, it's back on Weight Watchers I go, but this time, I fully intend to stick with it.  I've done it before (and lost 25 lbs!), but I've stopped exhibiting any signs of self-control, and I am inching back up to the VERY bad place (I crossed into the "just bad" place about a month ago). 


So, how will I ensure weight-loss success?  My dear, fair readers, that's where you come in.  Monday is my weigh-in day (as it has been every time I've dieted), so every Monday I have to report my success (or failure) to you guys.  That way, if I fail, I will fail publicly.  And everyone knows that public humiliation is the best motivator!  

Look forward to next week's post when, hopefully, I will have good news for you! (3 lbs, 3lbs, 3lbs...) And maybe I'll even have some funny anecdotes along the way...    

Wish me luck!  (Goal is to lose 10 lbs and start exercising 2-3 times/week)

PS - I'm already STARVING

Random's Manifest - Thursday Thoughts

Ta Da!!!  It's time again for RANDOM THOUGHTS!!!  YAY!!!!!!!  I know you're as excited as I am!! 

 

STARVING

Everyone knows that nothing makes you want to do something like being told you can't.  Eating?  No exception. I'm on a fast for a medical procedure tomorrow.  Haven't been able to eat since midnight.  Still have 20 hours to go.  I'm about to keel over.  

There have been plenty of days when I have plain forgotten to eat.  Didn’t feel like this!  Just being told that I can’t have food has made it the central focus of ALL of my thoughts.  I. WANT. FOOD.  So much food.  Hamburgers and fries and shakes and sushi and pizza and ice cream and marshmallows and pop tarts… Anything.  This fruit pie staring at me right now?  I’d eat its cardboard box at this point.  However will I make it to noon tomorrow??  Sigh…

The Bitch is Back

Yes, only the BITCH from the CPA Exam Board could turn the most amazing news into a total pain in my ass.  No congratulations whatsoever for passing Financial.  Rather, I get a curt email informing me that the Board has approved my request for additional time on the remaining section (yay!), followed VERY quickly by another email saying SYKE! – they won’t give me more time without more information (BOO!).  I told her to forget the whole damn thing and give me my Notice to Schedule for the final section.  And, I also indicated that I would NOT be okay with her keeping the $300 she already charged to my credit card to reschedule the section I passed.  I know for a fact she is going to say I shouldn’t have jumped the gun and assumed I would need to retake it, and that she has every right to keep that money.  Not like they don’t already have enough of my money – seeing as I’ve sunk approximately $5,000 into testing fees. 

Normally I reserve my animosity and harassing tendencies for the cable company.  But, I think my focus should shift to the Bitch for a while.  As soon as I pass the last section, I think I will make a hobby of ruining her life, much like she’s ruined mine.  Won’t that be fun?

Want to eat my own arm right now…

The Soap

My name is Kristen, and I’m a Y&R addict.

I admit, I have a problem.  I’ve invested roughly 31 years in the CBS daytime drama, the Young and the Restless.  LITERALLY watching since birth.  And I ask myself -EVERY DAY – why?  This show is insane, and I’m embarrassed that it’s an integral part of my daily life.  All shame aside - a couple of quick requests to the writers/producers:

1. PLEASE go ahead and reveal that “Mama Bear” is Sheila.  And, from the sounds of it, she now has Lauren’s face.  We all know where this lame and overdone storyline is going.  Let’s get this over with…
2. Get rid of Ashley.  Eileen Davidson is NOT a good actress.  She’s proven this in recent weeks.  Get a new one!
3. Billy and Victoria – Thank goodness they finally did it and got it over with.  Now, let’s get those two together for real.  Finally – a couple with chemistry!
4. Lily really needs some better wigs.
5. PLEASE tell Jack that Summer is his.  This is ridiculous.

 

I hope that old lady is okay

When I went to the pharmacy today to pick up my “prep kit” for my procedure tomorrow, a little old lady fell in the parking lot.  I, of course, (being a human being and all – and not Satan) ran to her assistance.  She swore she was okay, but I’m not sure.  She was pretty shaky.  I remember when that sort of thing used to happen to my Granny.  Scares the crap out of me.  I sure hope she’s okay.  Say a little prayer for her…

SOOOOOOOO Hungry….

Hot in the City

So, we all know I’m pretty psyched for spring.  However, I do find it odd that the high today is 85, and tomorrow, it’s 88.  It’s April.  I sure hope this isn’t a sign that our summer will be as dramatic as the winter was…

Bitchy Update

As I’ve been writing this, I heard back from the Bitch on my two [rather forceful] requests.  Yes, she will go ahead and send my Notice to Schedule.  And YES – she will refund the fees.  THANK GOODNESS.  I really didn’t want to have to wait for her in a dark alley with a baseball bat…

Chicken!  Grab hold of that table floating by and drift to safety!

Chicken is under water in Rhode Island!  Oh no!  Our horrible storms from last weekend made their way up to the northeast.  Chicken – I hope there’s no damage!  And, keep the frogs as pets.  They’re so cute!  And you know littleb would love that!   

Alright crazy kids – I’m off to starve some more, and do a little work for a while.  Cross your fingers that I survive this miserable procedure.  And that I can remember there are people who are actually starving in this world, and I am a gigantic spoiled bratty baby. 

Holla!  (Still sounds weird coming from me…)