The following ramblings are based on real-life experiences, mishaps, and downright screw-ups. Names (of past, present, and future boyfriends) have been changed or omitted to protect the innocent. And the guilty...

Monday, May 31, 2010

Highway to Hell

Well, in true Kristen form, I reveled in my glorious morning a bit too soon, and have been summoned back to the office.  Funny how you can work over 100 hours in 8 days and yet still get in trouble for not being at the office (even though you've been working from home since 7:30 am on a HOLIDAY).  So, Deac is back at home and I am here with both Boss-Men.  At least the fact that I cried all the way here is winning me some sympathy points.

Sometimes I hate my life...

Sit and Listen to the Rain

Deac and me, sitting in my office, drinking coffee and reading/working, respectively.  Rupert happily snoozing in between us.  Blues Traveler barely offsetting the rain in the background.  If I were reading (for fun) too, instead of writing about Program Compliance, it would be the perfect morning...

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Let's Go Crazy

Dearly beloved
We are gathered here today
to get through this thing called life

Electric word life
It means forever and that's a mighty long time
But I'm here to tell you
There's something else
The afterworld

A world of never ending happiness
You can always see the sun, day or night

So when you call up that shrink in Beverly Hills
You know the one - Dr Everything'll Be Alright
Instead of asking him how much of your time is left
Ask him how much of your mind, baby 

Cause in this life
Things are much harder than in the afterworld
In this life
You're on your own

And if the elevator tries to bring you down
Go crazy - punch a higher floor

If you don't like the world you're living in
Take a look around you
At least you got friends

You see I called my old lady
For a friendly word
She picked up the phone
Dropped it on the floor
(Sex, sex) is all I heard

Are we gonna let the elevator
Bring us down
Oh, no Let's Go!

Let's go crazy
Let's get nuts
Let's look for the purple banana
'Til they put us in the truck, let's go!

We're all excited 
But we don't know why
Maybe it's cause
We're all gonna die
And when we do (When we do)
What's it all for (What's it all for)
You better live now
Before the grim reaper come knocking on your door

Tell me, are we gonna let the elevator bring us down
Oh, no let's go!

Let's go crazy
Let's get nuts
Look for the purple banana
'Til they put us in the truck, let's go!

C'mon baby
Let's get nuts

Let's go crazy
Are we gonna let the elevator bring us down
Oh, no let's go!
Go crazy

I said let's go crazy (Go crazy)
Let's go, let's go 
Let's go

Dr. Everything'll be alright 
Will make everything go wrong
Pills and thrills and dafodills will kill
Hang tough children

He's coming
He's coming

- prince

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

The Downward Spiral

1:54 am.  Must have draft of 75 page application to client by tonight.  I am only halfway done.  Now, I'm thinking that "tonight" can be interpreted subjectively.  I'm thinking it'll probably be 4:00 am Thursday morning.  It's still dark then.  That counts as night, right?  Considering the push for this draft is to accommodate the client's vacation plans, and considering I am not allowed to have my own vacation plans since I will be spending the weekend in the office, I say 4:00 am, it is.  And they should be damn grateful.   

Moving on.  In today's (yet another) cop-out post, I am directing you to another blog.  Probably a stupid move, as I am shocked I have any readers left at all after my essentially month-long hiatus, and by introducing you to this blog, I am encouraging your defection from mine.  But, I'm doing it anyway because this post is just too frickin' hilarious not to share.  And, it pretty much sums up my entire month.  

Treat yourself to a hearty, raucous belly laugh: 


PAIN SCALE (also stolen from courtesy of Hyperbole and a Half): 

I'll give you three guesses as to where I currently fall on the scale (or off of it, as the case may be)... 

Monday, May 24, 2010

I'm So Tired - Part Trois

I worked from 9:30 am Friday morning to 9:00 am Saturday morning.  Granted, I took a break or two to eat and watch some tube (season finale of Grey's?  Can anyone say OH MY HOLY HELL??), but still.  No sleep.  Needless to say, I am very, very tired.

Consider this the explanation for my bloggy absence.

Off to work some more (yes, it's 12:20 am.  Figuring a minimum of 2 hours left tonight...).

Hope you're all doing better than I.

For your viewing pleasure I submit to you the first video ever aired on MTV.  Enjoy.

Sunday, May 16, 2010

So Alive

Just to let you know that I'm still alive and kicking, and still love you all dearly, I thought I would share the following gem with you.  I miss you all more than you will ever know!  But, work project from hell calls.  It will all be over soon though, and then you can look forward to hearing about Deac's and my adventures in the Magic Kingdom!  Hooray!


All of my love and devotion,


Monday, May 3, 2010

Brand New [M]ay

Well, May is turning out to be a month of new beginnings for me!

First off, back on weight watchers (ugh).  My goal is to shed 8 more pounds.  I will be content with 5, but I am striving for 8.  My mom decided to give it a shot, so I am joining her in the fun!  It worked SO well last time (over 20 lbs!) that I know if I stick with it for a couple of months, I'll be right back to my goal weight.

Second, I am going to work out again if it kills me (and it very well might).  I'm not saying it's going to happen every day - that's just unrealistic.  But, it will happen a few times a week.

Third - I am trying my hand at gardening.  I planted some pretty flowers and azalea bushes, and I'm going to see if I can actually keep them alive for once.  If it weren't for the torrential downpour we endured today, they'd be doing pretty well.

Fourth - I am going to be a foster birdie parent!  I have a nest in my eave with a mommy in it who has laid eggs! I can't wait until they hatch!  Yay!!!

Fifth - and here's the bombshell - I got a new car!!!!!!  After nine years with my faithful black Camry, I have traded it in for, well, another black Camry!  Only, I've gone from a fairly stripped LE to a FUUUUULLLLLY loaded XLE.  I got the deal I wanted, thank you very much!!  They hate me at the dealership.  A lot.  But, so what?  For less than $300/month I have a beautiful 2008 Camry XLE V6 with every feature I could ever want.  It only has 22K miles.  It's so grown-uppy!  I feel all important driving it!  So exciting.  I would go stare at it right now if I could, but it's at the service center getting new tires and touch-ups (part of the deal .  Again - Yay me!).  I will get it back tomorrow night, and then it's mine forever!!  Hopefully I won't get too many tickets driving it.  That V6 is FAST.

Anywho - back to work.  That's one thing about May that certainly isn't going to change!

Hope you're all having a fabulous day!


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